Dell Williams, Founder of the First Feminist Sex Boutique, Honored at Swedish Sexuality Education Conference

Dell Williams Honored at Swedish Sexuality Education Conference

At a conference on sexuality education in Sweden on November 26, Dell Williams, the founder of Eve’s Garden, told the story of how she decided to start the first-ever feminist sexuality boutique.  The three-day program over Thanksgiving included feminist professors and young scholars from Scandinavia, Europe, Africa and the U.S.    

Nina Lykke, Professor of Gender Studies at Linkoping University and conference director, is writing a book on feminist sexuality boutiques in Europe and thought it was important for Dell to talk about founding the Garden to underline the differences between the feminist model and mainstream sex toy shops.

In her presentation Lykke pointed out how shops founded on the Eve’s Garden model differ from mainstream shops that present themselves as merely “women-friendly.“  The mainstream shops include products that appeal to women but not much more.  “Shops like Eve’s Garden broadcast a pro-sex feminist message which implies that they focus on an ethical, sustainable, and pleasure-seeking model and on the empowerment of women,“ Lykke said.  “The feminist shops have also incorporated a key element of sex-education into sales.  The staff is trained to answer questions about what different products are for, which ones fulfill a specific need, and how to use them to maximize pleasure.  The safe-sex message is always incorporated, and they strive to recognize diversity in individuals’ sexual values and practices.“

Lykke also talked about the cross-over influence of the feminist shops, noting that the state-owned pharmacy in Sweden has begun selling a series of sexual products called “Trust in Lust” manly focused on women and women’s  sexual health.  Information on this conference and future events can be found at (www.genderexcel.org).     

Dell told the group about taking Betty Dodson’s BodySex workshop in 1970—in the nude!  Women shared their sexual frustrations, practiced masturbating together (!), something most women still aren’t comfortable doing (that’s just a guy thing, right?), and how a vibrator can be used to enhance pleasure and orgasm.  

The idea for a feminist sex shop accidentally started at Macy’s, New York City’s famed shopping emporium.  “After taking Betty’s workshop, I decided I wanted a vibrator, and Betty had told me that Macy’s had them,“ Dell said.  “So I went, and asked the man at the Information Desk where they were.  He asked me what I wanted it for, and I almost fainted.  I mumbled something like ‘My neck has been giving me a fit lately,’ and he told me to go upstairs to the back of the store to the small appliance department.“  In the 1970s, vibrators were marketed as muscle relaxers, not as orgasm enhancers! 

“When I got to the counter the vibrators were all lined up and plugged in, so I picked one up and turned it on.  Wow!  It almost buzzed out of my hand and the customers nearby were staring at me.“  Dell bought the Hitachi Magic Wand, which remains her favorite vibrator today, and the rest is a part of the history of feminist sexuality activism.  The full story of the founding of Eve’s Garden can be found in Dell’s autobiography, Revolution in the Garden which is available from www.evesgarden.com or from online booksellers.  

Dell began her talk by quoting from the “Female Sexuality Bill of Rights,” that begins with “the right to sexual enjoyment,” and ends with a reminder to “respect the sexuality of the elderly and disabled.”  Later, in a presentation on sex and disability, Margrit Shildrick from Queen’s University in Belfast, Northern Ireland, thanked Dell for including the sexual needs of disabled people in the mission of Eve’s Garden.  “We’ve made significant progress in addressing disability issues,” Shildrick noted, “but we still have a long way to go, especially in the area of sexuality.” 

Dell described how she became a feminist.  “It happened in less than five minutes,“ she said.  “I worked in an office on Fifth Avenue, and one day as I was standing by the water cooler I looked out of the window, and saw hundreds of women marching down Fifth Avenue.  I wondered aloud who those women were, a man at the water cooler said, ‘You don’t want to associate with those women. They throw their bras in trash cans and do all of these demonstrations.’  “But I thought, ‘Oh yes I do!’ and went out and joined them.”  This was the first Women’s Equality March, that took place in August, 1970.     

In September of 1974, Dell started a mail-order catalog, shipping vibrators out of her kitchen, but in less than a year, she opened the Garden in an elegant office building on New York’s tony 57th Street, just a stone’s throw from Carnegie Hall.   

Lynn Comella, an Assistant Professor in the Women’s Studies Department at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, who is writing a book about the history and impact of sex-positive retail activism and education in the United States, also spoke at the conference.  Comella pointed out that “Eve’s Garden founder Dell Williams, and Joani Blank, who founded Good Vibrations in San Francisco in 1977, revolutionized the world of sex toy retailing in the U.S. by creating what one retailer describes as the ‘alternative sex vending movement’—a retail-based model of sex education and social activism that is both a commercial enterprise and a political project.”

Eve’s Garden celebrated 35 years of service to women and their partners in 2009.  To access the Eve’s Garden catalog and recent news go to www.evesgarden.com.   

Rebecca Chalker is the author of The Clitoral Truth and teaches a course on the cultural history of sexuality at Pace University in New York City.  Her website is www.clitoraltruth.com.