Sex and the Music Factor 

Even before Elvis shocked American audiences with his pelvic thrusts, sex and music have long had a lustrous affair. Thanks to movies like Dirty Dancing and the ubiquitous Step Up series, we have witnessed first hand how rhythm and beats can encourage our bodies to grind sexually. But what is it about music that gets us all hot and bothered? Is it the songs? The artists? Good timing?

“The whole point of music is the emotion it produces,” said Dr. Tim Griffith, a professor of cognitive neurology at Newcastle University. Dr. Griffith’s research found that brain responses to music are just like brain responses to sex; the measured brain activity of someone who received trembles from music and the measured brain activity of someone having pleasurable sex are exactly the same.

In other words, music can send shivers down your spine.

According to a 2005 study conducted by Dr. Daniel Nettle, another professor at Newcastle University, musicians have up to twice the average number of sexual encounters compared to us regular folk. Not surprisingly, the number of sexual partners increased as creative output went up, thus explaining how Mick Jagger still gets hot Brazilian models and Bob Dylan racked up an impressive history of sexual conquests.

While such findings are less than shocking, I began wondering about my own relationships with music, sex, and love. Especially since the object of my own sexual interest (read: my boyfriend) is a musician. Add to that my long-standing status as a rock and pop devotee, worshipful of bands like The Beatles, Arcade Fire, and Radiohead, and our connection seems all but inevitable. After all, music is my aphrodisiac, so being seduced by a musician makes perfect sense. Less obvious, however, is the prominent lack of music in our sex life.

How is it that a musician and a music fanatic don’t have a love soundtrack? You know, music that we like to get-it-on to (but don’t). How would I even go about creating the perfect love soundtrack? And more to the point, is it even possible? I decided to probe the Internet for some answers.

Googling “music and sex” turned up a number of links, mostly recommendations from men to other men on what music is best to have sex to. My takeaway from this brief bout of research: By and large men like to use music to seduce women, and in true camaraderie, they like to share with other men what has worked for them.

One Amazon customer, for instance, recommended a list of albums specifically for “seducing older women, ages thirty-five to seventy.” Replete with comments, his list included artists Tony Bennett, Frank Sinatra, and John Coltrane, on which he proclaimed, "Listen to this guy… One more drink and bras off!"

My shock at being lumped in with seventy year olds aside (I'm thirty-four, exactly one year away from his targeted age group) I find it hard to believe that what turns me on—and it's not Coltrane—would fire up my mother’s love engine too.

More in tune with my age group was an article on Peeq.com, a sex-centric online community, that suggested “music 4 gettin' busy in our 30s.” Unfortunately, despite falling into this age group, the suggested Van Morrison, or “Van the Man” as he's referred to on the site, wasn't going to lure me into bed.

Alternatively, Askmen.com offered song suggestions by way of preferred music styles and categories and included how each style might enhance the sexual moment. Under “ethnic music,” reviewer David Strovny wrote, “if the music makes her feel sexy, she will proceed to show you exactly how sexy. Not to mention, penetration will definitely feel a little spicier.” I'll be sure to remember this the next time I order some spicy coconut curry at my favorite Thai restaurant.

Most of the websites I found didn’t offer suggestions from women to other women. Seeking a broader perspective, I resolved to find deeper answers on the streets of San Francisco.

Thirty-three-year-old Kristin Hogan likes to sing karaoke at the Napper Tandy. She was singing along to Michael Jackson's “PYT” at Amnesia's 80s soul and old school rap night “Hellatight” when I asked her what kind of music turns her on.

“It all started with a scene in the 80s coming-of-age teen comedy Fast Times at Ridgemont High,'” Hogan recalled, referring specifically to Damone’s insistence that “when it comes to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of Led Zeppelin's IV.”

Said Hogan, “I remember listening to it and thinking . . . yeah . . . that would work on me. Now that I think back, it has!”

Meanwhile, at SF Underground's Brazilian dance night, forty-six-year-old Richard Nava was checking IDs when I asked what kind of music he likes to get-it-on to. “Something soulful,” he said.  “Tribal rhythms, deep bass. For the mood, for both of us.

“The beat sets the mood,” he continued. “Some vocals are okay, but not too much moaning and droning. As the night continues, the music needs to get more tribal, darker, leading the way to more touching and less talk.” I asked him if this had worked in the past, to which he quickly replied, “I've had many conquests using music.”

Ahh . . . things were finally starting to make sense. But I have yet to get answers to some lingering questions. As does Dr. Griffith.

Despite the magnitude of his study, Dr. Griffith and his team couldn’t determine why a particular piece of music could produce pleasure for some but not others. For instance, Peeq.com commended Barry White as an artist to get busy to if you're in your thirties, while Hogan maintained that “Barry White is the kryptonite of mood music.”

Ultimately, it might not matter much. Chelsea Gelber, a twenty-three-year-old who prefers house music (particularly swoon-worthy Kascade), believes guys shouldn't try so hard: “To be honest, I'd start laughing (if a guy were) trying to create the moment with sensual, slow jazzy kind of music. That would turn me off, more than turn me on.”

Whatever the case, my boyfriend and I have yet to create our ultimate love soundtrack. However, we are experimenting with different types of music to establish the mood and communicate desire, learning our likes and dislikes along the way. For instance, despite my love of rock, wailing guitars and aggressive lyrics distract me from my “lovemaking” while something down tempo, like Air's Moon Safari, gets me naked fast. I’ve also discovered the art of compromise. He might want to hear Stevie Wonder when I'm more in the mood for Feist, so we settle on Bossa Nova. Even better, though, is that my boyfriend prefers seducing me with his own music, and, well, that works every time.

Kathleen Clark is a freelance writer and music and sex enthusiast in San Francisco. She currently reports on innovative trends in high-tech for L'Atelier, in addition to blogging about new music at Fierce Words.